The Bodleian First Folio

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Reference: E2v - Comedies, p. 52

Left Column


The Merry Wiues of Windsor. Anne. I meane (M. Slender) what wold you with me? Slen.

Truely, for mine owne part, I would little or

nothing with you: your father and my vncle hath made

[1490]

motions: if it be my lucke, so; if not, happy man bee his

dole, they can tell you how things go, better then I can:

you may aske your father, heere he comes.

Page. Now Mr Slender; Loue him daughter Anne. Why how now? What does M r Fenter here?
[1495]
You wrong me Sir, thus still to haunt my house. I told you Sir, my daughter is disposd of.
Fen. Nay M r Page, be not impatient. Mist.Page. Good M. Fenton, come not to my child. Page. She is no match for you. Fen.
[1500]
Sir, will you heare me?
Page. No, good M. Fenton. Come M. Shallow: Come sonne Slender, in; Knowing my minde, you wrong me (M. Fenton.) Qui. Speake to Mistris Page. Fen.
[1505]
Good Mist. Page, for that I loue your daughter In such a righteous fashion as I do, Perforce, against all checkes, rebukes, and manners, I must aduance the colours of my loue, And not retire. Let me haue your good will.
An.
[1510]
Good mother, do not marry me to yond foole.
Mist.Page. I meane it not, I seeke you a better hus­ band. Qui. That's my master, M. Doctor. An. Alas I had rather be set quick i'th earth, And bowl'd to death with Turnips. Mist.Page.
[1515]
Come, trouble not your selfe good M. Fenton, I will not be your friend, nor enemy: My daughter will I question how she loues you, And as I finde her, so am I affected: Till then, farewell Sir, she must needs go in,
[1520]
Her father will be angry.
Fen. Farewell gentle Mistris: farewell Nan. Qui. This is my doing now: Nay, saide I, will you cast away your childe on a Foole, and a Physitian: Looke on M. Fenton, this is my doing. Fen. I thanke thee: and I pray thee once to night,
[1525]
Giue my sweet Nan this Ring: there's for thy paines.
Qui.

Now heauen send thee good fortune, a kinde

heart he hath: a woman would run through fire & wa­

ter for such a kinde heart. But yet, I would my Maister

had Mistris Anne, or I would M. Slender had her: or (in

[1530]

sooth) I would M. Fenton had her; I will do what I can

for them all three, for so I haue promisd, and Ile bee as

good as my word, but speciously for M. Fenton. Well, I

must of another errand to Sir Iohn Falstaffe from my two

Mistresses: what a beast am I to slacke it.

Exeunt
Scena Quinta. [Act 3, Scene 5] Enter Falstaffe, Bardolfe, Quickly, Ford. Fal.
[1535]
Bardolfe I say.
Bar. Heere Sir. Fal.

Go, fetch me a quart of Sacke, put a tost in't.

Haue I liu'd to be carried in a Basket like a barrow of

butchers Offall? and to be throwne in the Thames? Wel,

[1540]

if I be seru'd such another tricke, Ile haue my braines

'tane out and butter'd, and giue them to a dogge for a

New‑yeares gift. The rogues slighted me into the riuer

with as little remorse, as they would haue drown'de a

blinde bitches Puppies, fifteene i'th litter: and you may

[1545]

know by my size, that I haue a kinde of alacrity in sink­

ing: if the bottome were as deepe as hell, I shold down.

I had beene drown'd, but that the shore was sheluy and

shallow: a death that I abhorre: for the water swelles a

man; and what a thing should I haue beene, when I

[1550]

had beene swel'd? I should haue beene a Mountaine of

Mummie.

Bar. Here's M. Quickly Sir to speake with you. Fal.

Come, let me poure in some Sack to the Thames

water: for my bellies as cold as if I had swallow'd snow­

[1555]

bals, for pilles to coole the reines. Call her in.

Bar. Come in woman. Qui. By your leaue: I cry you mercy? Giue your worship good morrow. Fal. Take away these Challices:
[1560]
Go, brew me a pottle of Sacke finely.
Bard. With Egges, Sir? Fal.

Simple of it selfe: Ile no PulletߛSpersme in my

brewage. How now?

Qui. Marry Sir, I come to your worship from M. Ford. Fal.
[1565]
Mist. Ford? I haue had Ford enough: I was thrown into the Ford; I haue my belly full of Ford.
Qui.

Alas the day, (good‑heart) that was not her

fault: she do's so take on with her men; they mistooke

their erection.

Fal. So did I mine, to build vpon a foolish Womans (promise. Qui.
[1570]

Well, she laments Sir for it, that it would yern

your heart to see it: her husband goes this morning a

birding; she desires you once more to come to her, be­

tweene eight and nine: I must carry her word quickely,

she'll make you amends I warrant you.

Fal.
[1575]

Well, I will visit her, tell her so: and bidde her

thinke what a man is: Let her consider his frailety, and

then iudge of my merit.

Qui. I will tell her. Fal. Do so. Betweene nine and ten saist thou? Qui.
[1580]
Eight and nine Sir.
Fal. Well, be gone: I will not misse her. Qui. Peace be with you Sir. Fal. I meruaile I heare not of M r Broome: he sent me word to stay within: I like his money well. Oh, heere he comes. Ford.
[1585]
Blesse you Sir.
Fal. Now M. Broome, you come to know What hath past betweene me, and Fords wife. Ford. That indeed (Sir Iohn) is my businesse. Fal. M. Broome I will not lye to you,
[1590]
I was at her house the houre she appointed me.
Ford. And sped you Sir? Fal. very ill‑fauouredly M. Broome. Ford. How so sir, did she change her determination? Fal.

No (M. Broome) but the peaking Curnuto her hus­

[1595]

band (M. Broome) dwelling in a continual larum of ielou­

sie, coms me in the instant of our encounter, after we had

embrast, kist, protested, & (as it were) spoke the prologue

of our Comedy: and at his heeles, a rabble of his compa­

nions, thither prouoked and instigated by his distemper,

[1600]

and (forsooth) to serch his house for his wiues Loue.

Ford. What? While you were there? Fal. While I was there. For. And did he search for you, & could not find you? Fal.

You shall heare. As good lucke would haue it,

[1605]

comes in one Mist. Page, giues intelligence of Fords ap­

proch: and in her inuention, and Fords wiues distraction,

they conuey'd me into a bucke‑basket.

Ford.

Right Column


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Scena Quinta. [Act 3, Scene 5] Enter Falstaffe, Bardolfe, Quickly, Ford. Fal.
[1535]
Bardolfe I say.
Bar. Heere Sir. Fal.

Go, fetch me a quart of Sacke, put a tost in't.

Haue I liu'd to be carried in a Basket like a barrow of

butchers Offall? and to be throwne in the Thames? Wel,

[1540]

if I be seru'd such another tricke, Ile haue my braines

'tane out and butter'd, and giue them to a dogge for a

New‑yeares gift. The rogues slighted me into the riuer

with as little remorse, as they would haue drown'de a

blinde bitches Puppies, fifteene i'th litter: and you may

[1545]

know by my size, that I haue a kinde of alacrity in sink­

ing: if the bottome were as deepe as hell, I shold down.

I had beene drown'd, but that the shore was sheluy and

shallow: a death that I abhorre: for the water swelles a

man; and what a thing should I haue beene, when I

[1550]

had beene swel'd? I should haue beene a Mountaine of

Mummie.

Bar. Here's M. Quickly Sir to speake with you. Fal.

Come, let me poure in some Sack to the Thames

water: for my bellies as cold as if I had swallow'd snow­

[1555]

bals, for pilles to coole the reines. Call her in.

Bar. Come in woman. Qui. By your leaue: I cry you mercy? Giue your worship good morrow. Fal. Take away these Challices:
[1560]
Go, brew me a pottle of Sacke finely.
Bard. With Egges, Sir? Fal.

Simple of it selfe: Ile no PulletߛSpersme in my

brewage. How now?

Qui. Marry Sir, I come to your worship from M. Ford. Fal.
[1565]
Mist. Ford? I haue had Ford enough: I was thrown into the Ford; I haue my belly full of Ford.
Qui.

Alas the day, (good‑heart) that was not her

fault: she do's so take on with her men; they mistooke

their erection.

Fal. So did I mine, to build vpon a foolish Womans (promise. Qui.
[1570]

Well, she laments Sir for it, that it would yern

your heart to see it: her husband goes this morning a

birding; she desires you once more to come to her, be­

tweene eight and nine: I must carry her word quickely,

she'll make you amends I warrant you.

Fal.
[1575]

Well, I will visit her, tell her so: and bidde her

thinke what a man is: Let her consider his frailety, and

then iudge of my merit.

Qui. I will tell her. Fal. Do so. Betweene nine and ten saist thou? Qui.
[1580]
Eight and nine Sir.
Fal. Well, be gone: I will not misse her. Qui. Peace be with you Sir. Fal. I meruaile I heare not of M r Broome: he sent me word to stay within: I like his money well. Oh, heere he comes. Ford.
[1585]
Blesse you Sir.
Fal. Now M. Broome, you come to know What hath past betweene me, and Fords wife. Ford. That indeed (Sir Iohn) is my businesse. Fal. M. Broome I will not lye to you,
[1590]
I was at her house the houre she appointed me.
Ford. And sped you Sir? Fal. very ill‑fauouredly M. Broome. Ford. How so sir, did she change her determination? Fal.

No (M. Broome) but the peaking Curnuto her hus­

[1595]

band (M. Broome) dwelling in a continual larum of ielou­

sie, coms me in the instant of our encounter, after we had

embrast, kist, protested, & (as it were) spoke the prologue

of our Comedy: and at his heeles, a rabble of his compa­

nions, thither prouoked and instigated by his distemper,

[1600]

and (forsooth) to serch his house for his wiues Loue.

Ford. What? While you were there? Fal. While I was there. For. And did he search for you, & could not find you? Fal.

You shall heare. As good lucke would haue it,

[1605]

comes in one Mist. Page, giues intelligence of Fords ap­

proch: and in her inuention, and Fords wiues distraction,

they conuey'd me into a bucke‑basket.

Ford. A Buck‑basket? Fal.

Yes: a Buck‑basket: ram'd mee in with foule

[1610]

Shirts and Smockes, Socks, foule Stockings, greasie

Napkins, that (Master Broome) there was the rankest

compound of villanous smell, that euer offended no­

strill.

Ford. And how long lay you there? Fal.
[1615]

Nay, you shall heare (Master Broome) what I

hau sufferd, to bring this woman to euill, for your

good: Being thus cram'd in the Basket, a couple of

Fords knaues, his Hindes, were cald forth by their Mi­

stris, to carry mee in the name of foule Cloathes to

[1620]

Datchet‑lane: they tooke me on their shoulders: met

the iealous knaue their Master in the doore; who

ask'd them once or twice what they had in their Bas­

ket? I quak'd for feare least the Lunatique Knaue

would haue search'd it: but Fate (ordaining he should

[1625]

be a Cuckold) held his hand: well, on went hee, for

a search, and away went I for foule Cloathes: But

marke the sequell (Master Broome) I suffered the pangs

of three seuerall deaths: First, an intollerable fright,

to be detected with a iealious rotten Bell‑weather:

[1630]

Next to be compass'd like a good Bilbo in the circum­

ference of a Pecke, hilt to point, heele to head. And

then to be stopt in like a strong distillation with stink­

ing Cloathes, that fretted in their owne grease:

thinke of that, a man of my Kidney; thinke of that,

[1635]

that am as subiect to heate as butter; a man of conti­

nuall dissolution, and thaw: it was a miracle to scape

suffocation. And in the height of this Bath (when I

was more then halfe stew'd in grease (like a Dutch‑

dish) to be throwne into the Thames, and

[1640]

coold, glowing‑hot, in that serge like a Horse­

shoo; thinke of that; hissing hot: thinke of that (Master

Broome.)

Ford. In good sadnesse Sir, I am sorry, that for my sake you haue sufferd all this. My suite then is desperate: You'll vndertake her no more? Fal.
[1645]

Master Broome: I will be throwne into Etna,

as I haue beene into Thames, ere I will leaue her thus;

her Husband is this morning gone a Birding: I

haue receiued from her another ambassie of mee­

ting: 'twixt eight and nine is the houre (Master

[1650]

Broome.)

Ford. 'Tis past eight already Sir. Fal.

Is it? I will then addresse mee to my appoint­

ment: Come to mee at your conuenient leisure, and

you shall know how I speede: and the conclusion

[1655]

shall be crowned with your enioying her: adiew: you

shall haue her (Master Broome) Master Broome, you shall

cuckold Ford.

Ford.

Hum: ha? Is this a vision? Is this a dreame?

doe I sleepe? Master Ford awake, awake Master Ford:

[1660]

ther's a hole made in your best coate (Master Ford:) this

'tis to be married; this 'tis to haue Lynnen, and Buck‑

baskets: Well, I will proclaime my selfe what I am:

I will now take the Leacher: hee is at my house: hee

cannot scape me: 'tis impossible hee should: hee can­

[1665]

not creepe into a halfe‑penny purse, nor into a Pepper‑

Boxe: But least the Diuell that guides him, should

aide him, I will search impossible places: though

what I am, I cannot auoide; yet to be what I would

not, shall not make me tame: If I haue hornes, to make

[1670]

one mad, let the prouerbe goe with me, Ile be horneߛ

mad.

Exeunt.
 

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<div type="scene" n="5">
   <head rend="italic center">Scena Quinta.</head>
   <head type="supplied">[Act 3, Scene 5]</head>
   <stage rend="italic center" type="entrance">Enter Falstaffe, Bardolfe, Quickly, Ford.</stage>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <l n="1535">
         <hi rend="italic">Bardolfe</hi>I say.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-bar">
      <speaker rend="italic">Bar.</speaker>
      <l n="1536">Heere Sir.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <p n="1537">Go, fetch me a quart of Sacke, put a tost in't.
      <lb n="1538"/>Haue I liu'd to be carried in a Basket like a barrow of
      <lb n="1539"/>butchers Offall? and to be throwne in the Thames? Wel,
      <lb n="1540"/>if I be seru'd such another tricke, Ile haue my braines
      <lb n="1541"/>'tane out and butter'd, and giue them to a dogge for a
      <lb n="1542"/>New‑yeares gift. The rogues slighted me into the riuer
      <lb n="1543"/>with as little remorse, as they would haue drown'de a<cb n="1"/>
         
      <lb n="1544"/>blinde bitches Puppies, fifteene i'th litter: and you may
      <lb n="1545"/>know by my size, that I haue a kinde of alacrity in sink­
      <lb n="1546"/>ing: if the bottome were as deepe as hell, I shold down.
      <lb n="1547"/>I had beene drown'd, but that the shore was sheluy and
      <lb n="1548"/>shallow: a death that I abhorre: for the water swelles a
      <lb n="1549"/>man; and what a thing should I haue beene, when I
      <lb n="1550"/>had beene swel'd? I should haue beene a Mountaine of
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   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-bar">
      <speaker rend="italic">Bar.</speaker>
      <l n="1552">Here's M.<hi rend="italic">Quickly</hi>Sir to speake with you.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <p n="1553">Come, let me poure in some Sack to the Thames
      <lb n="1554"/>water: for my bellies as cold as if I had swallow'd snow­
      <lb n="1555"/>bals, for pilles to coole the reines. Call her in.</p>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-bar">
      <speaker rend="italic">Bar.</speaker>
      <l n="1556">Come in woman.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-mqu">
      <speaker rend="italic">Qui.</speaker>
      <l n="1557">By your leaue: I cry you mercy?</l>
      <l n="1558">Giue your worship good morrow.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <l n="1559">Take away these Challices:</l>
      <l n="1560">Go, brew me a pottle of Sacke finely.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-bar">
      <speaker rend="italic">Bard.</speaker>
      <l n="1561">With Egges, Sir?</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <p n="1562">Simple of it selfe: Ile no PulletߛSpersme in my
      <lb n="1563"/>brewage. How now?</p>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-mqu">
      <speaker rend="italic">Qui.</speaker>
      <l n="1564">Marry Sir, I come to your worship from M.<hi rend="italic">Ford</hi>.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <l n="1565">Mist.<hi rend="italic">Ford</hi>? I haue had Ford enough: I was thrown
      <lb/>into the Ford; I haue my belly full of Ford.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-mqu">
      <speaker rend="italic">Qui.</speaker>
      <p n="1566">Alas the day, (good‑heart) that was not her
      <lb n="1567"/>fault: she do's so take on with her men; they mistooke
      <lb n="1568"/>their erection.</p>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <l n="1569">So did I mine, to build vpon a foolish Womans
      <lb rend="turnover"/>
         <pc rend="turnover">(</pc>promise.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-mqu">
      <speaker rend="italic">Qui.</speaker>
      <p n="1570">Well, she laments Sir for it, that it would yern
      <lb n="1571"/>your heart to see it: her husband goes this morning a
      <lb n="1572"/>birding; she desires you once more to come to her, be­
      <lb n="1573"/>tweene eight and nine: I must carry her word quickely,
      <lb n="1574"/>she'll make you amends I warrant you.</p>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <p n="1575">Well, I will visit her, tell her so: and bidde her
      <lb n="1576"/>thinke what a man is: Let her consider his frailety, and
      <lb n="1577"/>then iudge of my merit.</p>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-mqu">
      <speaker rend="italic">Qui.</speaker>
      <l n="1578">I will tell her.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <l n="1579">Do so. Betweene nine and ten saist thou?</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-mqu">
      <speaker rend="italic">Qui.</speaker>
      <l n="1580">Eight and nine Sir.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <l n="1581">Well, be gone: I will not misse her.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-mqu">
      <speaker rend="italic">Qui.</speaker>
      <l n="1582">Peace be with you Sir.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <l n="1583">I meruaile I heare not of M<c rend="superscript">r</c>
         <hi rend="italic">Broome</hi>: he sent me
      <lb/>word to stay within: I like his money well.</l>
      <l n="1584">Oh, heere he comes.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-for">
      <speaker rend="italic">Ford.</speaker>
      <l n="1585">Blesse you Sir.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <l n="1586">Now M.<hi rend="italic">Broome</hi>, you come to know</l>
      <l n="1587">What hath past betweene me, and<hi rend="italic">Fords</hi>wife.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-for">
      <speaker rend="italic">Ford.</speaker>
      <l n="1588">That indeed (Sir<hi rend="italic">Iohn</hi>) is my businesse.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <l n="1589">
         <hi rend="italic">M. Broome</hi>I will not lye to you,</l>
      <l n="1590">I was at her house the houre she appointed me.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-for">
      <speaker rend="italic">Ford.</speaker>
      <l n="1591">And sped you Sir?</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <l n="1592">very ill‑fauouredly M.<hi rend="italic">Broome</hi>.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-for">
      <speaker rend="italic">Ford.</speaker>
      <l n="1593">How so sir, did she change her determination?</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <p n="1594">No (M.<hi rend="italic">Broome</hi>) but the peaking Curnuto her hus­
      <lb n="1595"/>band (M.<hi rend="italic">Broome</hi>) dwelling in a continual larum of ielou­
      <lb n="1596"/>sie, coms me in the instant of our encounter, after we had
      <lb n="1597"/>embrast, kist, protested, &amp; (as it were) spoke the prologue
      <lb n="1598"/>of our Comedy: and at his heeles, a rabble of his compa­
      <lb n="1599"/>nions, thither prouoked and instigated by his distemper,
      <lb n="1600"/>and (forsooth) to serch his house for his wiues Loue.</p>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-for">
      <speaker rend="italic">Ford.</speaker>
      <l n="1601">What? While you were there?</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <l n="1602">While I was there.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-for">
      <speaker rend="italic">For.</speaker>
      <l n="1603">And did he search for you, &amp; could not find you?</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <p n="1604">You shall heare. As good lucke would haue it,
      <lb n="1605"/>comes in one<hi rend="italic">Mist. Page</hi>, giues intelligence of<hi rend="italic">Fords</hi>ap­
      <lb n="1606"/>proch: and in her inuention, and<hi rend="italic">Fords</hi>wiues distraction,
      <lb n="1607"/>they conuey'd me into a bucke‑basket.</p>
   </sp>
   <pb facs="FFimg:axc0073-0.jpg" n="53"/>
   <cb n="1"/>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-for">
      <speaker rend="italic">Ford.</speaker>
      <l n="1608">A Buck‑basket?</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <p n="1609">Yes: a Buck‑basket: ram'd mee in with foule
      <lb n="1610"/>Shirts and Smockes, Socks, foule Stockings, greasie
      <lb n="1611"/>Napkins, that (Master<hi rend="italic">Broome</hi>) there was the rankest
      <lb n="1612"/>compound of villanous smell, that euer offended no­
      <lb n="1613"/>strill.</p>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-for">
      <speaker rend="italic">Ford.</speaker>
      <l n="1614">And how long lay you there?</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <p n="1615">Nay, you shall heare (Master<hi rend="italic">Broome</hi>) what I
      <lb n="1616"/>hau<gap reason="illegible"
              agent="partiallyInkedType"
              extent="1"
              unit="chars"
              resp="#JS"/>sufferd, to bring this woman to euill, for your
      <lb n="1617"/>good: Being thus cram'd in the Basket, a couple of
      <lb n="1618"/>
         <hi rend="italic">Fords</hi>knaues, his Hindes, were cald forth by their Mi­
      <lb n="1619"/>stris, to carry mee in the name of foule Cloathes to
      <lb n="1620"/>
         <hi rend="italic">Datchet‑lane</hi>: they tooke me on their shoulders: met
      <lb n="1621"/>the iealous knaue their Master in the doore; who
      <lb n="1622"/>ask'd them once or twice what they had in their Bas­
      <lb n="1623"/>ket? I quak'd for feare least the Lunatique Knaue
      <lb n="1624"/>would haue search'd it: but Fate (ordaining he should
      <lb n="1625"/>be a Cuckold) held his hand: well, on went hee, for
      <lb n="1626"/>a search, and away went I for foule Cloathes: But
      <lb n="1627"/>marke the sequell (Master<hi rend="italic">Broome</hi>) I suffered the pangs
      <lb n="1628"/>of three seuerall deaths: First, an intollerable fright,
      <lb n="1629"/>to be detected with a iealious rotten Bell‑weather:
      <lb n="1630"/>Next to be compass'd like a good Bilbo in the circum­
      <lb n="1631"/>ference of a Pecke, hilt to point, heele to head. And
      <lb n="1632"/>then to be stopt in like a strong distillation with stink­
      <lb n="1633"/>ing Cloathes, that fretted in their owne grease:
      <lb n="1634"/>thinke of that, a man of my Kidney; thinke of that,
      <lb n="1635"/>that am as subiect to heate as butter; a man of conti­
      <lb n="1636"/>nuall dissolution, and thaw: it was a miracle to scape
      <lb n="1637"/>suffocation. And in the height of this Bath (when I
      <lb n="1638"/>was more then halfe stew'd in grease (like a Dutch‑
      <lb n="1639"/>dish) to be throwne into the Thames, and
      <lb n="1640"/>coold, glowing‑hot, in that serge like a Horse­
      <lb n="1641"/>shoo; thinke of that; hissing hot: thinke of that (Master
      <lb n="1642"/>
         <hi rend="italic">Broome</hi>.)</p>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-for">
      <speaker rend="italic">Ford.</speaker>
      <l n="1643">In good sadnesse Sir, I am sorry, that for my sake
      <lb/>you haue sufferd all this.</l>
      <l n="1644">My suite then is desperate: You'll vndertake her no
      <lb/>more?</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <p n="1645">Master<hi rend="italic">Broome</hi>: I will be throwne into<hi rend="italic">Etna</hi>,
      <lb n="1646"/>as I haue beene into Thames, ere I will leaue her thus;
      <lb n="1647"/>her Husband is this morning gone a Birding: I
      <lb n="1648"/>haue receiued from her another ambassie of mee­
      <lb n="1649"/>ting: 'twixt eight and nine is the houre (Master
      <lb n="1650"/>
         <hi rend="italic">Broome</hi>.)</p>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-for">
      <speaker rend="italic">Ford.</speaker>
      <l n="1651">'Tis past eight already Sir.</l>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-fal">
      <speaker rend="italic">Fal.</speaker>
      <p n="1652">Is it? I will then addresse mee to my appoint­
      <lb n="1653"/>ment: Come to mee at your conuenient leisure, and
      <lb n="1654"/>you shall know how I speede: and the conclusion
      <lb n="1655"/>shall be crowned with your enioying her: adiew: you
      <lb n="1656"/>shall haue her (Master<hi rend="italic">Broome</hi>) Master<hi rend="italic">Broome</hi>, you shall
      <lb n="1657"/>cuckold<hi rend="italic">Ford</hi>.</p>
   </sp>
   <sp who="#F-wiv-for">
      <speaker rend="italic">Ford.</speaker>
      <p n="1658">Hum: ha? Is this a vision? Is this a dreame?
      <lb n="1659"/>doe I sleepe? Master<hi rend="italic">Ford</hi>awake, awake Master<hi rend="italic">Ford</hi>:
      <lb n="1660"/>ther's a hole made in your best coate (Master<hi rend="italic">Ford</hi>:) this
      <lb n="1661"/>'tis to be married; this 'tis to haue Lynnen, and Buck‑
      <lb n="1662"/>baskets: Well, I will proclaime my selfe what I am:
      <lb n="1663"/>I will now take the Leacher: hee is at my house: hee
      <lb n="1664"/>cannot scape me: 'tis impossible hee should: hee can­
      <lb n="1665"/>not creepe into a halfe‑penny purse, nor into a Pepper‑
      <lb n="1666"/>Boxe: But least the Diuell that guides him, should
      <lb n="1667"/>aide him, I will search impossible places: though
      <lb n="1668"/>what I am, I cannot auoide; yet to be what I would
      <lb n="1669"/>not, shall not make me tame: If I haue hornes, to make
      <lb n="1670"/>one mad, let the prouerbe goe with me, Ile be horneߛ
      <lb n="1671"/>mad.</p>
   </sp>
   <stage rend="italic rightJustified" type="exit">Exeunt.</stage>
</div>

                                
                            

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